What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
