so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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