Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I cut my penus on the lid.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help