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• (256): View more from Alabama

  As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.

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• (315): View more from New York

  can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet

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• (415): View more from California

  the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication

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• (415): View more from California

  I have another pimple on my ass cheek.

  (420): View more from

  I'll be there in 10 minutes.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (502): View more from Kentucky

  Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (647): View more from Ontario

  I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  You is good. You is important. You is a slut.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  Pedi-lyte stocked

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.

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• (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.

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