Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
