remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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