i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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