My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
