To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
the liver wants what the liver wants
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
