3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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