Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card. http://tfl.nu/3ttc
  Replies (39) Good night (1466) Bad night (4805)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  What'd you do?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Its more like what im about to do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight. (734): What'd you do? (313): Its more like what im about to do. http://tfl.nu/2yqx
  Replies (6) Good night (3602) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.

  (1-831): View more from California

  stop. you already have a dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company. (1-831): stop. you already have a dog http://tfl.nu/bxqv
  Replies (8) Good night (939) Bad night (1814)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn. http://tfl.nu/vfme
  Replies (18) Good night (610) Bad night (3566)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad http://tfl.nu/80vf
  Replies (23) Good night (1087) Bad night (3542)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.

  (305): View more from Florida

  Did you save them?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Who?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning. (305): Did you save them? (404): Who? http://tfl.nu/1xdf
  Replies (28) Good night (5471) Bad night (1141)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate. http://tfl.nu/z0ff
  Replies (10) Good night (8761) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (325): The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am http://tfl.nu/kqzx
  Replies (11) Good night (1129) Bad night (2921)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes http://tfl.nu/vn7y
  Replies (16) Good night (966) Bad night (4429)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high". http://tfl.nu/d3ih
  Replies (2) Good night (1383) Bad night (835)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (682): I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery. http://tfl.nu/qxsn
  Replies (4) Good night (1995) Bad night (599)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex. http://tfl.nu/djdz
  Replies (5) Good night (1391) Bad night (666)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some. http://tfl.nu/bkik
  Replies (27) Good night (3340) Bad night (855)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich http://tfl.nu/ehbw
  Replies (6) Good night (791) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  It's not too late to disappoint her you know...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again (1-919): It's not too late to disappoint her you know... http://tfl.nu/57hn
  Replies (3) Good night (802) Bad night (228)

Randomize