Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.