Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Randomize
