Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
where are you?
Hypothermia
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
