It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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