last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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