WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize