I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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