I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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