i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
