hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize