he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize