You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Randomize
