party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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