yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
