he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
