I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
