so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
