Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?