It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm like, not good at living.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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