get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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