i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
