I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
