u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I need a burrito and a hug.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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