We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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