I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
I have to watch that.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
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Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar