Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize