She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
The power of my boobs compel you
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
