i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
