The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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