If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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