It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
