My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
