was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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