On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Randomize
