Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize