the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
