Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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