Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize