Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
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Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
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I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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