if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
