I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
